Moving Onwards and Forward

So it's been a while since I wrote anything. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I didn't have anything to write. It's just that sometimes writing can be difficult. Once you set things down in words, the truth of it becomes known, it becomes a hard fact and no amount of nice thoughts or cheery anime is going to change that.

It's been almost two years since my uncle passed away, and another uncle a year after. They lived full lives but it left a hole in our family. I had started to run but got up to about running for 30 minutes when the first of my uncles passed. After that, i didn't feel like running any more, the joy I had felt kinda vanished.

Joy is a hard thing to come by and I've tried to find it where I can. Writing hasn't brought joy, just sad memories. I don't like the idea of writing excuses but I don't write this for that. I write because it's time to step onwards and forwards. This does not mean that I'll forget those who we've lost or that their dreams will be faded as we will always remember them.

I've started working (almost a year now) in a new role as a graphic team leader. At first I was uncertain if I'd make it past my probation as I'm quite new to it. However I realised that all I could try and do is be the best that I can be and try and that if I wanted something done, to try and change things to be better. Since I've started the change that I've noticed the most is not what I have done but how being there has changed me.

I don't feel tired all the time now and I don't feel sad. I feel happy and look forward to everyday. I wake up early to get into work early, I find I stay at work later because I enjoy what I'm doing. I find that there are more things to look forward.

I've created a Sketch Club at work and it's been running for several months now. I've been championing it and pouring all my effort into making it a positive force for good. It's only an internal community within the company now.

 

I'll probably talk about all this a lot more in the future. Netflix's Terrace House is calling me to finish watching it. It seems it won't be denied either!

Until next time!